A Moment I Would Like to Remember

Today at IKEA, Lucas was guarding our meatballs at the table while I got a couple of drinks (I could still see him Mom, don't worry.) Walking back, I was holding a large diaper bag, a water, a coffee and a wiggle worm. A man walked up to me and said I looked like a disaster waiting to happen. (Funny, I was just thinking that I had a reasonable handle on the situation.) So he carried my water to the table for me. A true gentleman.

We made it through our shopping trip - Lucas wheeling the stroller at times like a race car, Sofia getting very fussy at the moment I needed my brain the most, and, as a result, me feeling mildly exasperated a good portion of the time. On the way out I was thinking how terrible a mother I am. I was not thinking this with all of my heart, mind and soul - I was also working on my ice cream cone, carrying a set of pots and pans, sharing stroller duties with Lucas and boarding an elevator - but I was definitely aware of this thought process - "what do I need to do to become a better-than-terrible mother?"

Just at that moment I heard "You are the best mother." I looked up nervously, sure that I would see someone throwing me a sarcastic look. But instead I saw a warm, kind lady beaming genuinely in my direction. She was a former preschool teacher and, as it happens, the wife of the gentleman who carried my water (she had not known of our earlier interaction.) She said they had seen us several times throughout the store and she kept thinking to herself that I was being a great mother.

I'm not dismissing my self-critique from before. I find when these thoughts surface, there is a reason and they must be listened to and acted upon rather than excused away. One thing I want to practice is not allowing any exasperation to surface in the form of sarcasm or belittlement toward my children...to deal with it before it bubbles up with humor and a good dose of perspective. Even the tiniest amount is counter-productive to my mission as a mother.

But it was certainly uplifting to hear these kind words from an outsider. Maybe, through prayer and supplication, I have potential :) Lucas seemed to take the words to heart too. As I was loading up the car, he called from his booster seat (between licks of soft serve) "We're the best family, aren't we mom?"